Creative Force, the primal creative power, is flowing through and around our Universe every second of every day. It does not know boundaries of time, space, fear or limitations of imagination.
It only wants someone to play with, and when humans play by its rules, miracles happen. Somewhere around the middle of last year, I started to sense that “Something else” was wanting to emerge into my life. I resisted.
Then something inside me started to wilt, and I began to feel classic signs of burnout. I had no concentration capacity, I struggled to keep track of simple tasks, nothing made sense, and my sleep and good humour seemed to have left me. Although I was in constant (desperate) conversation with Spirit, spiritual practice became a challenge. Various attempts to rebalance my life didn’t work. Finally, recognising that I had nothing left to contribute in that context, I left my job and surrendered to the whims of an unstable world.
It wasn’t enough. Spirit asked me to trust enough to relinquish everything that I had regarded as solid foundations of my life. I became homeless – although never without sanctuary. I became dependent on my loved ones; and finally, Spirit showed me that even that which I regarded as my life purpose was no longer mine to do. In a year which includes my 60th birthday, a significant coming of age, I was asked to detach from everything that gave my life structure. It was an almighty and painful release.
Fortunately for me, I have an innate curiosity to see what will happen next, and although the six months of uncertainty were challenging, I knew the power and importance of surrender. I sat with choices I had made, and wondered if I was beyond redemption. I realised how my drive to serve community had hurt some of my closest relationships, and caused me to be not present to people as dear to me as my own heartbeat.
Determined to shift gear, refocus, and do better, I accepted my losses and went about exploring a new path that I imagined would be quieter. Spirit had other plans. There is an incubation time for any Creative Process, and sometimes all Spirit requires of us to completely let it go so that Spirit can just get on with its work.
The immense project that Spirit has laid before me required this deep process of trust; looking back, I realise that parts of the process were seeded years ago, long before I even imagined myself as an interfaith minister or knew anything about interfaith engagement. As I step now into the pioneering role of Global Interfaith Ambassador for Emissaries of Divine Light South Africa and EDL International, I am humbled beyond measure at the task ahead of me. Simultaneously, I am filled with gratitude and light at the creative opportunities and collaboratiive possibilities that have landed in my field.
I have learned that every voice, no matter how harsh, is the Voice of God. My task and yours is simply to sit and listen deeply, go within, sit with the grief and loss of change and finally, surrender. In the silence and in the void, the most true Voice of God will whisper into life that which wants to emerge. This is the Creative Force of the Universe, the One Tone. This is the way of miracles.
Rev. Berry Behr
